Lost

Not what I was looking for or wanting
Not what I was expecting
But perhaps perfect
Lost with no hope of return

Stream of Conscious

This may be the longest I have gone between posts. It is funny how I let opinions of others affect me- regardless if I am conscious of it or not... I am excited to report that this post is being written from the comfort of a reclined pose in my bed! Yes indeed, thanks to my brother- otherwise who knows when I would have gotten around to it-I am writing from my brand spanking new laptop!! It is beautiful. He put a lot of work into it. Thank you, Thank you! T-Rex is all but a thing of the past- right where it belongs. I just have to transfer some files over and find a good home for someone who likes prehistoric artifacts. It is much better than being chained to the freezing corner. Miracles never cease.
I am grateful I believe in miracles, that God has the power and is willing if necessary to perform a miracle in my life and others lives. There is great comfort in that- whether it happens or not, knowing if it were necessary it could be done helps to get through whatever I'm wading through at the moment. I just wish the wading was more along the lines of a hot summer day walking through a streambed in the forest of North Carolina. There was one particular spot outside of Chapel Hill I loved to go to. It was a easy trail walk in the beautiful woods to an expansion of the stream bed deep enough to swim in and big rocks to sit in the sun on and dry off...

I am often amazed at how strongly our personal will/desire can cloud our view and vision- basically to the point of deceiving ourselves to the bitter end. Choosing to hold onto certain pieces that support our position and ignoring the ones that don't to the point you cannot see it as any thing else. The worst is when you know that is a possibility but you have convinced yourself you have been objective in your analysis...
Once again the cliche- "you don't know what you have until it's gone" has proved its truth and why it has lasted through the years.

I am grateful for the underlying peace I feel despite... despite many things.

I hope to learn- always.

BONES!!!

Sometime last year I took my niece on a "Heather and Jody date". Just time with the two of us. Monday it was Jacob's turn. I asked Jacob what he would like to do several weeks ago. He was quick to reply- BONES! Dinosaur bones! The animation and gesturing of excitment was contagious. He even found a coupon for $2 off the museum and kept it safe until the big day. He only called a couple times to get a specific date... There is nothing like a child's excitment and enthusiasm. These dates are more fun and worthwhile than just about anything else I do. Besides there is no other boy so excited to see and go on a date with me than Jacob.








From the moment we walked into the museum that finger was pointing and he was telling me to look, look!


And it hardly stopped!

The museum had a lot of fun hands on activites for kids. Jacob tried them all.

It was President's Day and it was crazy busy!

Thsi one was the coolest because the kids got to get dirty. Bury the dinosaurs in the sand and water- created your own future fossils...




Love that boy!!

I wouldn't want that crawling over to get to me...

He picked out on his own the shirt I gave him for Christmas to wear. And crazy enough- his pants used to be my brothers when he was little.

And what did he want for a treat after? Cheetos and root beer of course!

But it had to be in the special dinosaur cup with straw.

Thanks for the great date!!

Love you Jacob!!

Beautiful

It is not what I am told,

It is how I am treated,

That makes me feel beautiful.

The Summit

I'm not sure I am ready to write this story- do I want the world to know... I somehow feel responsible and ashamed- although it wasn't my fault. I need a shrink to help me figure that one out. And- truly- it wasn't THAT bad. I do admit I'll be happy when the flash backs in my mind go away and leave me in peace. But, I'm going to push through and write it so I can leave it behind me. They say writing is therapeutic, right?

Tim- my brother- stated he was going home for my dad's 60th birthday and invited me to come. Drive out Friday when I got home from work and surpise him Saturday morning. I had no plans I couldn't rearrange and no reason not to-- and despite warning him about the weather- he was bound and determined to go. The crazy thing is- despite praying about it- it didn't feel like a bad idea. Not sure all the why's behind that response- but I may have an hypothesis or two formulating.

I was talking on the phone with my dad while we are driving- he having no idea we were in Nevada trying to surprise him- when we reach the summit between Wendover and Wells; Tim was driving at the time. There was some snow but nothing to cause alarm when... The nemesis of ice struck and we began sliding out of control. I quickly told my dad I had to go and hung up right before we struck the median for the first time. The median pinged us to the barrier, which ponged us back to the median, which again pinged us to a stop sideways in the middle of the freeway across 2 lanes. Fortunately we both stayed calm- Tim said that during the incident after an initial "oh, no- don't do that..." I just said as we were hitting repeatedly- "it's okay, we're fine, it's alright" and that helped him keep a clear head. Because the truth is- we were fine. Miracles abounded and it was all fairly smooth. We didn't roll, hit someone else, get hit by others while we started the car the car to get out of the middle of the road, and there were no real injuries. Somehow the car started for us and we were able to drive down the summit to the plains- it smelled horrible, sounded horrible, and temperature gage was racing to the H. But we were able to pull off in an area of cell phone reception and let the car cool. Unfortunately, we had no idea where we were to give specifics and the car wasn't starting- oh, and it was snowing... ( And that was the rudest USAA representative I have ever talked to. Usually they are really nice. ) By the grace of God- literally- the car started and we were able to get far enough to A) see a mile marker to tell where we were, B) have a no service exit we could pull off on so we would not be on the freeway and C) maintain cell phone reception. Considering we were in the middle of Nevada- cell phone service was a miracle. And the smoke/steam coming out of the car at that point was impressive.
Now came the waiting game. Tim was still determined to get home- trying to find a car rental we could get to and continue onward... With all lovingness- Crazy man! His car is totalled, we are stuck in the middle of no where and he just laughs and looks to see how to plough ahead. I am sure it would do me some good to be more like my brother. But in so many ways we are polar opposites. Once we came to a safe place to land I was in a bit of shock- nothing dramatic - but upset. Tim laughed a bit when he saw I was crying- in my defense - they were small quiet tears. And the thing I was the most upset about- and still am- was Tim losing his truck. Yes I grieved over a truck. No doubt about it being totalled. The truck has been in the family for 15 years, I drove it as a sophomore in college, and it was just what he needed- and it was finished. What can I say- I'm sentimental. No way to replace it and the thought of the extra burden on his family still stings. Jacob really was going to be sad. And well- we just ping ponged across the freeway barely making it somewhere safe and were stuck on a cold snowing night waiting for a tow truck with no heat. I think I handled it fairly well, thank you very much...
I never got really cold- chilled yes, cold no. I had a blanket, coats, sweaters and my smart wool thin ski socks on- those socks were the best decision I made that day. I didn't even have all the possible layers on I had with me. And standing on a mountain in below 0 temperatures with the ski teams has toughened me up a bit. The funny part is that Tim didn't even have his coat zipped up. The cab of the truck is so small our body heat was maintained- and Tim has body heat. If I was to be stuck in the snow with anyone- it would be him! The picture below demonstrates the difference in us. Look at the windshield and you will see where he was sitting and where I was sitting.





His side of the windshield is dry and clear. My side... snow and ice! I've written before that we balance the universe between hot and cold- I finally have proof!!!

After an hour of waiting- the tow truck arrived and carried us off to Wells Nevada- only 10 miles away, and dropped us off at a hotel.


I was barely able to open my door far enough to get out.

Tim had the most impressive injury with a seat belt rash. And he hit his knee. My shin was throbbing a bit and I have a nice little bruise to prove it. Besides a little stiffness- that was about it.

Wells- it isn't what I would say as on the up and up. Tim had to give up the dream of making it to California. No rental cars. I was surprised when we found a grocery store. The 4- way Cafe at the Casino served an eatible dinner- more or less. And we attempted to sleep hoping the storm would clear enough someone could come and rescue us. I must say, that was a long night. I haven't laid that wide awake for a long time.

Subplot!!

Here is the story line I haven't followed yet. While Tim is calling Andrea to find out what our rental car options were... I was calling Sterling. I am so grateful to have a friend I can call at anytime about anything. He didn't answer so I left a text- stranded in Nevada... can't remember what all I wrote. I felt terrible when I found out he got the text in the middle of a date- but fortunately Quinn is a friend and was okay with the distraction. He was willing to leave right then and there to come and get us. That is a good friend. In fact, I think that is the very definition of a true friend. After some push back from my brother, who was not ready to give up the fight- once Tim finally conceded to our true fate- we made plans for Sterling to leave in the morning after the storm passed to rescue us from the ghost town of Wells. Honestly I will never be able thank him enough.

Sterling had to wait for the storm to lighten up in Salt Lake before he left so we had some time on our hands to kill while we waited. We were booted out of our hotel at 11am. So we took to the streets of Wells to do what the billboard suggested- Discover Wells!

There she is-- The thriving Metropolis of Wells!! It is lined with motels and car shops- and that is about it. Except...

The Gentelman's Club Bellas. This hat was in a cafe gift shop. Not quite my style- but we were discovering Wells- and this was the "tourist trap" of the town. It "needed" to be documented.

I could hardly believe it when we saw these signs! A block historical walking tour! I wished Emily was there.

Most of Wells was lost in last year's Earthquake. The few buildings in town were mostly closed as a result.

But never fear! The Lone Wolf Gun shop was going strong. It was soooo cold with the wind chill that even Tim's face and ears were bright red and stinging. So we opted to go inside to get warm. And I do have the "nickname" of being a wolf. It was perfect.

We met the gunsmith who is in the picture if you look close enough. He was so happy and nice and out of place. He has lived all over the US including Nashville playing music for 20 years. I had to ask how he ended up in Wells. He loves guns and wanted to work in a place with little competition. He is happy as can be in the middle of nowhere helping people with their guns from 100 miles around. That is a man who wasn't afraid to live his dream as unconventional and crazy as it may seem. I respect and honor that.

The final leg of our walk through town we found the Ranger station. I don't know if you know I-80 very well but it isn't known for its trees. Not quite sure what National Forest it was protecting...

Finally my knight in Sterling Armor arrived. He drove 2 1/2 hours each way- giving up his entire Saturday. It was a beautiful drive back to Salt Lake.

In the end- there is a hero, 2 saved persons, and a lot of gratitude. (Gratitude that only increased realizing I don't live in Wells and that is a really great thing.)

I thank God for his many miracles.

AND... Happy Birthday Dad!

Happy Birthday Dad!!!

If my 30th birthday was an event- then my dad’s 60th certainly must be. February 14th, 2009 is not only, yet again, Valentines Day but, Val McOmber’s 60th birthday. In my life, Valentines day has always been Val’s day. I am very grateful for my father’s birthday because I have always had something to celebrate that day. Yet, how do you celebrate Val McOmber’s big day, the 60? A big bash is not his style and he is emphatic about not wanting gifts. He has charged me to a technogical deed as my gift to him. He knows technology is not my thing. It’s not that I’m not tech savvy or that it is difficult- I choose not to be tech savvy. And that is a discussion that qualifies as –not the time or the place. But that just does not fill the tab. My brother David suggested we all write something about Dad and then put it in a book for him. I thought- I can do that. So… these are my words I chose to share about my dad.


Dad will always help. He will put off his own pursuits and join you in yours. The only exception is if he thinks it is better for you to do it yourself- (or if a Star Trek(ish) show is on, but I think his DVR has changed that. =) ) Even then… And there is very little my dad cannot do. It does not matter what brakes or needs to be built- Dad knows how and just does it. I had no concept of a repairman as a child. "Don’t all Dads know how to do that…?"

Dad prefers to teach by example rather than by word. I remember at the Rinaldo house when a storm teamed up with time and took out a significant portion of the back fence. As with all our fences, we shared it fence with one of our neighbors- in the back to be precise. It is a memorable fence because it had been climbed many times to retrieve balls that had been thrown with our childish accuracy. At home there had been some discussion on how to proceed to take care of the situation. You just do not, not have a fence in California. If I remember the details marginally correctly, Dad decided to buy the lumbar and fix it himself. I over heard Tim and Jordan talking one day about it and they were mildly upset that Dad did not at least make the neighbor pay for part, if not all the cost, considering Dad was doing the labor. This sounded reasonable to me so I mentioned it to Dad. I may not remember the exact words- but I will never forget the substance of what he said. After what may have been a sigh of sadness he said- I’m hoping Tim will learn from this that it is about doing good to your neighbors that is important, not money. I do not know if Tim learned this lesson- although with some time and distance he just may have- but I know I did. He did not want to tell Tim- he wanted to show him. And that is how he has always been.

Dad wants the best for his children- end of story. It is one of Dad’s greatest strengths and also one of his weaknesses. The hard part is that life doesn’t always deliver what appears to be the best case scenario-, which leads to a bit of grief. I know Dad understands that we did not sign up for a sorrow free, picture perfect life when we chose to come to earth. But his love is so great; he struggles when we struggle and y excepting life’s dole and at times- our personal choices may be challenging. For this I offer my own advice. This is my new favorite analogy, probably because I made it up. Life is like a roller coaster- filled with ups and downs, twists and turns. Once you get on, it does not stop until it is over. So trust the seat belt of the gospel- learn to let go and enjoy the ride. (And… it is okay to let out a scream every once in awhile.) As a parent watching your child’s ride, remember they wanted this ride. Trust the engineers who put the ride together and smile. They waited a long time in line for it. It will all end up okay- even if they lose their lunch over the edge.

Dad’s testimony of the gospel is one thing I have always known- no questions asked. I do not have any specific memory of my father bearing his testimony to us/me apart from listening to him at church. He probably did, and if he did unfortunately, I do not have a specific memory of it. But I never once questioned his testimony. Never. It was borne daily in his actions: kneeling at his bed at night to say his prayers, doing his home teaching, getting up at 6am every Sunday- his day of rest- for years for morning meetings, reading his scriptures, obeying the word of wisdom… Simply always "living" the gospel. There is a strength and trust in the gospel that a child inherits when they have never questioned their parent’s testimony. I have never witnessed either of my parents questioning the gospel.

Not to say that my father and I have not had our moments or disagreements, however few. But, I have never questioned his love for me and I hope he has never questioned my love for him.
Happy 60th Birthday Dad
Love,
Heather~

Zoo, Dinner, and Books

A couple weekends ago I was invited to share a day at the Zoo with my brother Tim and his family. Considering it was January 24th and raining- well not much animal life going on. But, when you have a year family's pass, it doesn't really matter because you didn't pay for that specific day. The turkeys were hoping to get inside the Cafe, the kids tried to measure up to the gorillas, and Heather Kenna was just happy to be along for the ride.

The next item of business was food. Something kid friendly... Red Robin.

I like my hat...

And finally a little story time before I raced off to my date with Anya to see "Thoroughly Modern Millie".

I am grateful to live close to family. I need to take more advantage of it...