Thursday, December 15, 2011

Are you Casanova Impaired?

To all the Casanova impaired men in the world- this is for you.

The key to a women's heart is Respect and Thoughtfulness- add a dose of sincerity and we are in trouble.  If self is all your used to thinking about and helping, then you are doomed to frustration when it comes to women.

The end.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Alas

I give up- it is only Novemeber and I am already in trouble with the cold frigid nights.  I was walking Jasper- my brothers dog I am dog sitting- and my hands started to sting with cold and move like they belonged on the short bus. Currently I am running around the house with a blanket tied around my waist and I wish it extended to wrap around my feet.  I need more long smart wool socks.  Anyone out there wanting to buy that for me for Christmas? I made up my mind.  If I am going to survive winter I need to let go of the white knuckle grip I have on the pocket book and give in to 67 degrees on the thermostat.  It's true- I am leaving 65 degrees behind and going for a life of luxury- or at least sanity. Thank goodness for the new windows!  And I am thinking I need to put on the kettle and have a cup of something hot.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

This is My House


There are two questions I can count on being asked when I run into old friends/acquaintances I haven’t seen in a long time. “So, any boys I should know about?” and “Where do you live now?” Can you guess which question I dreaded answering? One might think it is the dating question, but no, it was the where do you live question. Surprised? In the 12+ years of the dating question, I have managed to come to terms with it, but having to tell people I live in the same house after 6 ½ years, renting… That was painful. You see I was only going to live in that house for one year. One year soon turned into two, two into five, and, and, and… I felt like nothing, nothing changed or progressed in my life. I was over 30 living Ground Hog’s Day, except I was getting older and the rest of the world moved on leaving me farther and farther behind. Every time I answered the question of where I lived it was a great reminder how I felt like I was getting no where in my life- and there was the proof.

But on July 28, 2011 things finally changed. I few pieces of paper to sign and I became a home owner- and nothing will be the same again.

I talked about buying a house for a long time but was extremely non-committal and honestly- not ready. Buying a home is a big step- end of story. And, buying a house as a single female poses a few interesting challenges. It is surprising the emotional ties connected to buying a home alone and the challenge to overcome- an actual grieving process many women find themselves going through as we come to terms with forging ahead independently. And for me it also meant committing to staying in Utah.

So I did what any religiously based person would do, I started to pray. I asked what should I do? Is buying a house the right decision for me? And then I waited. That wasn’t working so I prayed some more. A few months pass and I am still praying about it. You see I once had a friend talk about her experience in buying a house. She said it is a really big decision and should come with a really big feeling of this is right. I was looking for a clear yes- this is the right thing for you. But I wasn’t getting anything. Finally I got my answer, “you have good judgement and freedom to use that judgement- this is your decision - you decide.” No wonder I was praying for months with no answer- it was my choice. I decided I was going for it.

There is a quote I keep on my blog that always stood out as true to me although I had never specifically noted it in my life- that is until now.

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness concerning all acts of initiative and creation. There is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now." Goethe


The story of my house is this quote fulfilled in my life.

Over the last year + I had 3 or so realtors I had “tried on”. But no one was working out for me. They send me their automatic lists of properties and show me a place if I asked for it. That is until Spencer came along.

Spencer Williams was referred to me by my roommate Anya- he is really good with first time home buyers she said. Ok, lets give him a try. Our first meeting was at his office where we looked at a lot of houses on the computer and made a list of some I was interested in looking at. Mostly he was trying to get an idea of what I was looking for. That was a Saturday. On Monday we went looking at the houses- and it was a typical bust. Granted some were closer than I had seen but I just felt wrong in all of them. We arranged to get together on Tuesday of the following week, my first day off after the upcoming work week. He said he had gotten an idea of what I was looking for and was going to research properties for me and come up with a list to see. Miracle! someone willing to do some leg work for me.

My grandmother Rachel passed away that week bringing my parents into town and all thoughts of house hunting out the window. Fortunately Spencer texted to remind me of our meeting and gave me the address of the first house. I meet up with him and he had already been in the house and said- forget it not even worth your time and I followed him to the next house. 982 E Montclair Dr. I still remember my thoughts as I first entered the house- this house is in my budget? I can afford this? You must realize the kind of houses I had been looking at and how discouraged I was. This house was open, with a large kitchen, most of the house updated, 4 bedrooms, a tall basement that you don’t have to duck to walk in, a garage, a nice yard, and the big picture window in the front room. The house was filled with light from all the multitude of windows. I felt I could be at home here. This was a house- the only house I had seen, I felt I could live in. it had everything on my little list that was half on paper and half in my heart. Some things don’t come with words. We went and saw the other houses on the list and nothing compared, I felt awkward and uncomfortable in them all.

I asked if I could see the house again in the morning with my parents before they left to leave town back to California. So at 8:30 am the next day I showed my parents the house to see what they thought. My mom loved the windows like I did. My dad had nothing but nick picky comments on the house. As we walked away my mom asked when I was going to put an offer in. I was somewhat surprised at this comment but I already knew in my heart this was the one. The comfort of knowing my parents had seen and approved of the house before I put an offer in was invaluable. This was the most difficult decision I can remember making and having them just barely able to see it was a miracle.

In fact many of the miracles of this house was the timing of everything. My timeline was I needed to be moved out of my old house before Oct 1st so I wouldn’t be locked into a contract. I was leaving for Jordan Sept 23rd for 2 weeks so I needed to be moved in before then and preferably much before then to be settled. It was June 29th when I first saw the house- and as we know just in time for my parents to see it.

Wednesday. I met with my loan officer for the first time- Holly Stirling. I decided to become pre- approved for a loan to help the offer process go over more smoothly. The whole time I still can’t get this house out of my mind and I am really starting to get nervous. What if I have actually found it? Yikes.

Thursday. I met with Spencer to put together my offer- in case I do in fact decide to send it in. Poor Spencer- I nearly had a heart attack when he started writing an email to their realtor with my offer specifics. He had to stop what he was doing- point out there was no subject line and it is a draft for when I am ready. Then he had to talk me though all the reasons why everything was going to be ok. He learned pretty quick that I need time to process everything.

Friday. I can’t get putting an offer on the house, TODAY, out of my mind. My plan was to fast on fast Sunday to be sure and put the offer in on Monday. The house had been on the market since October-what was the rush. But it kept coming back to me over and over. Until I called Spencer on my way out of town to Southern Utah for a vacation and asked if he thought I should just put the offer in today. So next thing I know I am telling him to put the offer in right now. I thought I was going to freak out after I did that- especially how much I had been stressing over everything. No sleep since I first saw the house. Any dozing I did do was interrupted with panics such as- there is no vent system over the range… But I had the opposite reaction. I felt wonderful. I was happier than I can remember- cloud 9. I felt a huge burden lift I didn’t know I was carrying and saw doors opening in all directions previously closed. Talk about a confirmation on a decision! Interesting I didn’t feel that way until after I made the decision and moved forward. I talked with a friend Andreas about how I felt as I drove down South. I was excited.

Friday pm. Spencer texts me- 2 other offers had been made on the house in the last 24 hours, I will tell you more when I know more. AHHH! What? Ok, now what? I get to Cedar City and meet up with Anya and her family and am having a hard time concentrating on things. Richard the III was a little hard to follow while trying to sort through the mess I had just walked into. Andreas texted me the most perfect words- Have faith, you will get the house. You had that good feeling for a reason. However hard for me to believe- it was comforting and hopeful. I referred back to his words frequently. And I realized, if I had waited until Monday to put the offer in, the house would have been gone.

Saturday. I learned I had until Sunday noon to change my offer if I so chose to my best. The owners didn’t want a bidding war- just a one time best offer. I spent the day half shopping with Anya at the outlets and half pondering over and over if and what to change my offer to. Once again, Andreas was an invaluable resource helping me ponder through and sort through things. Helping me discover the questions I needed answered to make good choices and be confident in what I was doing. In the end however, it was all up to me. What did I think- what was the house worth to me, what can I afford, what is strategic against the other bidders knowing nothing of their offers? I started to get a cold sore from the stress. That night I gave Spencer my new offer and once again- sleep was not found.

Sunday- 1am ish. I spent a while on my knees petitioning heaven. I really didn’t feel I knew what I was doing. Fast Sunday. I said I was putting the structural integrity of the house in Grandpa McOmber’s hand and the negotiations in Grandpa Peterman’s hands. They were the best ones I could think of for their jobs. After that a few hours of sleep were found and I trusted in whom I left the work to.

Monday. Anya and I got up early and hiked Angel’s Landing in Zion. We drove back to Orem to celebrate the 4th with Anya’s family. Soon after we arrived at her parent’s house, I received a text to call Spencer when I could. I was scared to call. I almost wanted him to say I lost the bid so it would be all over and I could move on and be done with the stress. But instead he said… “You are second, but they like your financial situation better so are offering you the opportunity to raise your offer 2K to match the highest bid and go with you.” True to form I told him I needed to think it over and I would call him back. I didn’t initially know what to do. I had already spent the last 24hrs thinking that I over bid myself and was stressed the current bid was too high already. 2K more? So I told Anya and her brother-in-law was there. He said they had a similar situation but they refused to up their price and they were still chosen. It is just a matter of how important financial security is to them. Immediately I felt calm and knew my answer. I called Spencer back and said- “My offer stands. They asked for my best and I gave it- there is no more. They have to decide what is more important to them.” That was the best I felt since I first heard there were other offers. And it felt really good to know I made the right move.

Tuesday. Getting out of my car at work I got another text from Spencer to call him. I always got nervous when this happened. I won. They ended up choosing me. He congratulated me on calling their bluff and I was speechless. I didn’t know how to react. I was happy but overwhelmed by the responsibility I now had on my shoulders. I think it was a really good thing Andreas had reinforced to me there are opportunities to turn around all along the way so I knew I had a out if needed.

July 5-28 There was nothing but bumps and bruises all along the way. It is a lot of work to get everything needed for a mortgage. I learned about electrical problems that needed to be addressed by the inspector- but I also learned the house was structurally in as good of shape as possible. (thanks Grandpa Mac) Then the appraiser came and valued it 15K under my price- meaning the banks would not finance it. This is 2 weeks or less before we are supposed to close. In the end- they were able to get the appraiser to come up 10 K and they agreed to fix the electrical. They also wanted me to pay closing costs since this is under the previous offer for the house. I said no- and they had to agree. (It is great being in a buyers market). All of this made more stressful because their realtor was out of town for a week making things back up to the last minute.

July 29th I closed on my house at - interestingly enough- the price of my first original offer. (thank you Grandpa Peterman) My mom was in town and able to be there to support me in signing my life over to the bank.

Aug 1st I received the keys to my house and brought over my first few things- a giraffe, toilet paper and my Costa Rica bowl to christen it.
I had the whole month of August to move in. My dad made a return trip and was able to help move the things I was getting from Grandma. I had family and Chris help me move into my house. I remember sitting in the chair in the front room not wanting to go back and be in the downtown house. I knew that was not my home- 982 Montclair was my home. It felt so good and right to be there. And so it continues today. I am still loving my home. It was the most stressful thing I have done but truly rewarding in everyway. I have roses I cut from my yard sitting on my kitchen table right now- I love it.

I am truly grateful for the many miracles that enabled this to happen. The timing was perfect- even with the gentle mercies of my parents being able to be here at just the right times. A great thank you to Anya for putting up with me in my processing of the whole event and her willingness to stay here and be my roommate. Thank you to Andreas who had the right words at the right time. Thank you to Chris for helping me with the big move. My brother Tim and Dad for helping with moving. Mom, Anginette, Andrea and the kids for helping clean the house as I moved in. And of course thank you to the heavens that opened and God providing the miracles to lead me to the ultimate success of being a home owner. This is the right place for me right now- and that is joy.

Andreas was right, I did have that amazing feeling for a reason.  And I was grateful for it because I may not have endured through it all without it.  And, Goethe was right- once one is committed- then the heaven open to prepare the way.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Training at Al-Hussien Society- Amman

Play day ended and the work of the trip immediately began.  Al Hussein Society was our work destination for the next 4 days.  It is a rehab society focus on pediatrics.  I was truly impressed with their vision, goals, and programs.  One half of the building was for the therapy work and the other half of the building was their school for children with needs.  They had their own wheelchair shop and technicians for modifying chairs to the specialized needs of the children.  A almost ideal partner to participate in the program LDS charities created to distribute wheelchairs. 
This first day was dedicated to setting up our training room, meeting with the translators and having some definitions translated.  Basically the behind the scenes day always necessary.  I was very impressed with how prepared and thoughtful the humanitarian couples were in having everything we could possibly want ready and waiting for us.  But I was once again a bit disappointed in our lunch options.  I don't eat American fast food in America and I really wanted to try Jordanian food...  But Popeye's it was. 

At the end of this day Clay had a great idea. He saw an indoor climbing gym in Amman and suggested we take a break from the couples and work out some of our jet lag on the wall. We offered to take a taxi but Brother Lee was insistent he be our chauffeur. Eventually we realized he was just as anxious to be away from others and choose different meal options as we were. We had a great time- it was a beautiful gym facing west toward the sunset. And the owner wasn't so bad to look at either... =) He gave us great dinner options and even gave me his phone number in case we needed anything. Man I wish I had a picture of him. But I do have a picture of his gym.  If Clay and I get to have a follow-up trip I do think we might need to visit here again.  Just look at that sunset!







Perhaps not the best picture of Clay... But is was the only picture I had of the climbing wall.



I swear he didn't even twitch for an hour.  I think if he isn't moving then he is sleeping.  But we loved Brother Lee's willingness to serve.



Falafel- at the recommendation of the good-looking Jordanian gym owner...  It was amazing!


And the ice cream shop next door- that was perhaps the best ice cream I ever had.  It is amazing what a little freedom, exercise and good food can do for the soul.  I was ready for whatever the next day had to bring.  I was nervous I hadn't prepared well enough-but that is my typical fears.  Everything went really well over the course of the next 3 days of training.  I will credit most of that to the answering of a sincere prayer for higher help.

The next morning started with a sunrise view of the city...  There are a lot of people in Amman.  Everything is built out of stone because there is little to no timber to use.




Clay taught me the key to success is to connect immediately with your audience.  Even before the official training began we talked to the class participants and got to know them a little.




This is the opening ceremony where the officials discuss the importance of the training- I liked the picture because it was a good visual of the classroom.  We wanted all the participants in wheelchairs so they had experience in them- especially with ones that do not fit well.  In the beginning it was difficult to get everyone in a wheelchair- but by the end, we couldn't get them out of them.

There were so many pictures to choose from on our training.  Most importantly with the lecture there was a lot of hands on.  Practice assessing each other, assembly of the wheelchairs right out of the box, and practice in using the wheelchairs themselves. And of course the most important is their assessing and fitting real wheelchair users that are in need of a wheelchair.  Unfortunately blogger is complaining about all the pictures I am wanting to add.  Maybe I can add some more later- but this gives you a feel for the training.







The women in this picture that I am talking to is the Princess of Jordan.  She is a classy lady and cut through all the political hub bub and focused right on what was important.  Easy to talk to and very engaging.  I must admit, I was impressed by her. 

The whole gang- my new friends in Amman Jordan



We were shepherded immediately to Irbid after the 3rd day of training and had to leave our 5 star hotel, gourmet breakfasts and new friends behind.  A whole new chapter began.

Friday, October 7, 2011

Day 1- Petra and the Dead Sea


Around Feb or March of this year my co-worker Andy started telling me about a Humanitarian project he started working with through the church.  (Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints)  Wheelchair trainings to create a self sustainable local force to safely and correctly fit and educate wheelchair users who are recipients of distributed wheelchairs the church supplies.  The trainers are physical and occupational therapist- 2 per training.  The church pays your ticket, hotel, and meals.  Short term specialists set-up the contracts and arrangements and humanitarian missionaries put together the details.  Trainers just need to show up and teach the 3 day training courses. 
As soon as he told me I knew I wanted in.  I have always wanted to do humanitarian work and I love to travel.  Next thing I know I am at a training day and on the "list" of credible therapist trainers waiting for my opportunity.  The call comes in the beginning of the summer- Jordan- end of Sept.  I was awed.  Jordan- the middle east?  So excited!  I never imagined my life would open to an opportunity to take me there.

This is the beginning of the that story.

Clay Watson was my co-trainer.  I was so grateful to have him along.  All the areas in the training I was weak on- he was very strong.  I think we made great teaching partners.  It is also handy to have a 6'4 man to walk around foreign countries with, espeically at night.
We started the adventure 2pm Friday,  Sept 23rd.  SLC to Paris, Paris to Ammon.  24 hours of traveling.  I would like to state for the record that I had a much better seat than Clay had on the long flight to Paris.  The Cullimore's and the Lees were there at the airport to pick us up and whisked us away to dinner.  Clay did have his checked bag lost and had to have it delivered the next day which made me feel really good about my decision to go carry on with my luggage.  That is right 2 weeks- all carry on.  I am a little proud of that fact.  Dinner was a delicious sharwerma- the best I had the whole time and then it was off to bed.

11pm in bed time and 3:30 am wake-up to be out the door by 4am for our Petra adventure.  Good thing it was during jet lag when my body had no clue what time it was.  3 hour drive to Petra, 9 hours of hiking in Petra followed by a surprise stop.  Tired and happy was the theme of the day.

Castle Ruins from the Crusades
at Sunrise
 This was a quick stop on the way to Petra- my first taste of the amazing history surrounding the area.


Sunrise
the South is much more barren than the North


Moses' Spring
Legend has it that this is where Moses struck the rock for water


This is looking out toward Petra
I could hardly believe what I saw
I travelled 1/2 way across the world to find Southern Utah


Rocks formations on the road to Petra- look familiar?

Offical beginning of the slot canyon road to the city

Water is a big concern in Jordan
All over Petra Aquaducts and cisterns were found demonstrating the great lengths they went to to preserve water.

The slot canyon was the road to Petra.
It had remaints of the stone paved road.

All over Jordan there were cats- but no stray dogs.

First peak

Second peak


The capstone piece of Petra revealed

Love the camals

The 3 Petra explorers- Brother Lee, Clay and I

Petra is one large city built out of stone.  The facades are grand.  Most have fallen done over the centuries but there are still plenty of remants to catch a glimpse of the past.

It is difficult to see but on top of the mountain on the left side of the picture is a white dot- 
that is Aaron's tomb

There are cairn "gardens" all over.  Not used for direction- possibly just tourists playing with rocks




Most of the facades for these have fallen- but imagine what it looked like when every where that was flat and a hole had a facade on it.


Pottery pieces were everywhere



What the inside looks like.  Granted this is inside the largest room we found.  Generally speaking inside was a room- some with inlets as found here.  Very few had any adjoining rooms and others had tomb sites.


In addition there was a Byzantine church- as well as Roman Ruins- (which I don 't have any pictures of)



At the top of the hike to the "Monastery" there was a cool place to rest- literally


The Monastery


A trinket shop at the "End of the World"


View from the top





 On the way back from Petra we took a different route home.  Along this way we found many new and exciting sites.  We even found a herd of camels blocking the road.

Camel


More camels


The road we travelled down- Clay and I were so tired we actually managed to fall asleep during this drive.


Our suprise destination- the Dead Sea


The interesting rock formation is called "Lot's Wife"



The Dead Sea-
Apparently it is usually glassy still- but there was an unusual rain storm right before we arrived causing
a lot of waves.


Tired but happy


Brother Lee got up close and personal with the Sea as he filled a bottle with the salty water.  The sea is far below sea level- the lowest point on earth and is 26% salt.

The day ended with meeting up with other missionary couples for dinner- why Chinese when we are in Jordan?  Well- we weren't choosing- and we weren't complaining- ok maybe we were a little bit...

A big thank you to Brother Lee for his sacrifice of his day to enable us to have a great adventure and see one of the great sites in this world.

That is it for Day 1.
More to follow soon.

Theater